Book Recs for the Small Town Love Interest in a Holiday Movie

Hey there, Small Town Love Interest in a Holiday Movie, mind if I call you Small Town for short? 

I know life isn't easy for you. Good flannel shirts aren't cheap, stubble takes maintenance, and you are no doubt extremely busy with your successful coffee shop/bakery and the single-fathering/reading to sick children/rescuing kittens you do on the side. Plus all that wood-chopping and cookie-making really eats into your Netflix time. You didn't ask for a feisty blonde/redhead to come from the city and bring back memories of your teenage heartbreak and/or put you out of business. 

You probably wanted to watch TV this Christmas, not pretend to be engaged to a stranger for reasons that, let's face it, even you aren't clear about.  

When are you going to get some time to yourself, Small Town? After the big happy ending? Whilst navigating a new relationship you've committed to far too early? Will you both be the same person once the Christmas Tree comes down and the January bills arrive? 

It'll be ok, Small Town. I promise. 

To help you through this festive period of uncertainty, I've curated a list of books designed to keep a woodsy, masculine bloke entertained this winter... without a single mention of the 'C word'.  

Pine by Francine Toon

Sometimes the countryside is fucked up, Small Town. Take a trip to Scotland (unless you are already a stereotypical Scottish castle owner who is being charmed by an American with her modern sensibilities, in which case... stay where you are, and also sorry about that). Here the rural community is oppressive and ghosts from the past make the forest a bleak, terror-filled place. 

Beartown by Fredrik Backman

Surely as an All-American man in a snowy part of the country, Ice Hockey matters to you. Here a small town's (haha!) financial future rests on their teenage ice hockey team, only for scandal to tear the town apart after a player is accused of sexual assault. I'm sure you're worried about your own town's finances - that Christmas festival isn't cheap - and so this is an ideal read, and a chance to show that you are sensitive about mysoginy. 

The Snowman by Jo Nesbo

Back to the mysoginy. Men freaking love Jo Nesbo books, and I'm sure you are no different. Nothing will help you get through that snowman making competition and overly cutesy snowball fight like the prospect of curling up under the covers and reading about some snowman-themed murder.

Sherlock Holmes and The Three Winter Terrors by James Lovegrove

Some pure escapism for you here, and an opportunity to make clear to the big-city heroine that you are a deep thinker who enjoys classic literature and solving puzzles. You're more than your rock-hard abs, Small Town. All that's left is to pop on a period drama and she'll be all over you.

The Hunting Party by Lucy Foley

Back to Scotland, again, and this time we skirt dangerously close to the 25th December, as a group of entitled friends head to a luxury cabin for a New Years party. There, a rugged woodsman tries to track a murderer... but don't worry... he doesn't fall in love with anyone. This is the perfect reminder that people suck and the best place to be is in the middle of nowhere (when not being murdered). 

 

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